I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
