***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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