I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
