ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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