stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
