Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
