i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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