its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
