Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
