Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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