I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Acid is not a monday night drug
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
