I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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