I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
