We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
