I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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