Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
he shaved USA in his pubs
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Randomize
