apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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