Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
