Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
