its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
