Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
