I think I just saw someone hide a body.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
