I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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