I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize