it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
