is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize