You're my little dorito
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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