If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
