I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Randomize
