Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Holy shit dude........stairs
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
