I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
