I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Holy sore nipples Batman
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
