Sponge bath it is.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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