What a fucking waste of an outfit
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
