I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize