I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Randomize
