4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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