so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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