Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
