I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
