Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
