Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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