The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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