Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize