She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
