New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
