Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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