I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
