The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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