doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
