I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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