Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
